Love is uncertain, your finances aren’t – what to do when the love is gone (Part 2 of 2)

Marci • April 30, 2012

In the last post , we covered listing assets and liabilities, and working out your monthly cash flow, when dealing with a separation. Now we move forward with steps that are less tedious, but more emotional. Remember, your life is moving forward through this process.

 

STEP THREE – Make copies of ALL important paperwork: Bills, insurance, mortgage documents, all of it. You need to sort your files, drawers and cabinets. This is not a time for misplaced or lost documents – you may need them in settlement proceedings.   This step is crucial to your ability to speak about your financial and personal affairs. While it sounds daunting (it will be time consuming) you may be surprised how therapeutic it can be to put your paperwork in order. If necessary, hire an organizer to help.

STEP FOUR – Talk to your Spouse: This may be the hardest step of all.   You need to decide how to divide the assets and liabilities. In a perfect world, together you will reach an agreement on who is moving out of the house or if you are selling, as well as custody of the kids and / or pets. However, given that emotions run high, you will likely need to involve a neutral third party.   Getting to this division of assets and liabilities as well as custody and other agreements may require lawyers, or perhaps a mediated process. It is very rare for couples to settle matters without some outside guidance. Choose what works best for both of you and follow through with what you are advised to do.   Steps one and two will go a long way towards helping you move through this step smoothly.

 

Factors to consider throughout all four steps:

Alimony and Support: After the separation, one of you may receive monthly payments from the other. Keep in mind that any money you receive will help you qualify for a future mortgage. It is important to have these payments documented and recorded on your monthly bank statements.   If you are paying your spouse, make sure that your payments are well documented. Most lenders understand support payments and treat them fairly.

Mortgage: If your family home and mortgage are in both of your names, you have probably wondered, “what will happen to the house?”

Don’t panic. Sit down with a mortgage professional and run some numbers. With an estimate of your monthly cash flow (thank goodness we took care of that in step two), your mortgage broker will show you how much you can afford to borrow on your own. Remember, alimony and support can help you to qualify for a mortgage.   If your mortgage is not in both names, you will definitely need financial and legal advice to ensure the separation is fair to both of you.

Like all things, this too shall pass. At times, the process of separating a relationship and finances may feel like a never ending, painful journey. These few brief paragraphs certainly simplify the financial aspect, but it can be a long and difficult one. Remember to take time for yourself. Make a commitment to do things you enjoy and the rest of this “work” will be easier.

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Breaking Down the Real Costs of Homeownership

By Marci Deane • November 26, 2025
Don’t Forget About Closing Costs When planning to buy a home, most people focus on saving for the down payment. But the truth is, that’s only part of the equation. To actually finalize the purchase, you’ll also need to budget for closing costs —the out-of-pocket expenses that come up before you get the keys. Closing costs can add up quickly, which is why they should be part of your pre-approval conversation right from the start. Lenders will even require proof that you’ve got enough funds set aside. For example, if you’re getting an insured (high-ratio) mortgage, you’ll need at least 1.5% of the purchase price available in addition to your down payment. That means a 10% down payment actually requires 11.5% of the purchase price in cash to make everything work. Let’s break down some of the most common expenses you should prepare for: 1. Home Inspection & Appraisal Inspection : Paid by you, this gives peace of mind that the property is in good shape and doesn’t have hidden problems. Appraisal : Required by the lender to confirm value. Sometimes this is covered by mortgage insurance, sometimes by you. 2. Legal Fees A lawyer or notary is required to handle the title transfer and make sure the mortgage is properly registered. Legal fees are often one of the larger closing costs—unless you’re also responsible for property transfer tax. 3. Taxes Many provinces charge a property or land transfer tax based on the home’s purchase price. These fees can range from hundreds to thousands of dollars, so you’ll want to factor them in early. 4. Insurance Property insurance is mandatory—lenders won’t release funds without proof that the home is insured on closing day. Optional coverage like mortgage life, disability, or critical illness insurance may also be worth considering depending on your financial plan. 5. Moving Costs Whether you’re renting a truck, hiring movers, or bribing friends with pizza and gas money, moving comes with expenses. Cross-country moves especially can be surprisingly pricey. 6. Utilities & Deposits Setting up new services (electricity, water, internet) can involve connection fees or deposits, particularly if you don’t already have a payment history with the utility provider. Plan Ahead, Stress Less This list covers the big-ticket items, but every purchase is unique. That’s why it pays to have an accurate estimate of your personal closing costs before you make an offer. If you’d like help planning ahead—or want a breakdown tailored to your situation—let’s connect. I’d be happy to walk you through the numbers and make sure you’re fully prepared.

Why a Mortgage Pre-Approval Protects Both Your Head and Your Heart

By Marci Deane • November 19, 2025
Why a Mortgage Pre-Approval Protects Both Your Head and Your Heart There’s no denying it—buying a home is an emotional journey. In a competitive market, it can feel like you need to stretch beyond your comfort zone or bid above asking just to have a chance. That pressure can make it hard to separate what you want from what you can realistically afford. One of the biggest pitfalls buyers face is falling in love with a home that’s outside their price range. Once that happens, every other property seems like a compromise—even the ones that might have been a perfect fit otherwise. The best way to avoid this heartache? Get pre-approved before you start shopping. What a Pre-Approval Does for You A mortgage pre-approval gives you more than just a number—it provides clarity, confidence, and protection: Know your buying power : Shop within your true price range and avoid disappointment. Spot potential roadblocks : Uncover issues like credit bureau errors before you make an offer. Get organized : Learn exactly what documentation you’ll need so there are no surprises. Lock in a rate : Many lenders hold your rate for 30–120 days, giving you peace of mind if rates rise. Save yourself heartache : Protect yourself from falling for a home you can’t afford. Head vs. Heart Buying a home is about balance. Your head tells you what’s financially sound, your heart tells you what feels right—and both matter. A pre-approval helps bring those two sides together, so you can make confident choices without emotional stress clouding your judgment. The Bottom Line Looking at properties for fun is one thing—but if you’re serious about buying, a pre-approval is the smartest first step you can take. It sets realistic expectations, saves time, and protects your emotions along the way. If you’d like to explore your options and get pre-approved, I’d be happy to walk through the process with you. Let’s make sure you’re ready to shop with confidence.

Co-Signing a Mortgage in Canada: Pros, Cons & What to Expect

By Marci Deane • November 12, 2025
Co-Signing a Mortgage in Canada: Pros, Cons & What to Expect Thinking about co-signing a mortgage? On the surface, it might seem like a simple way to help someone you care about achieve homeownership. But before you sign on the dotted line, it’s important to understand exactly what co-signing means—for them and for you. You’re Fully Responsible When you co-sign, your name is on the mortgage—and that makes you just as responsible as the primary borrower. If payments are missed, the lender won’t only go after them; they’ll come after you too. Missed payments or default can damage your credit score and put your financial health at risk. That’s why trust is key. If you’re going to co-sign, make sure you have a clear picture of the borrower’s ability to manage payments—and consider monitoring the account to protect yourself. You’re Committed Until They Can Stand Alone Co-signing isn’t temporary by default. Even once the initial mortgage term ends, you won’t automatically be removed. The borrower has to re-qualify on their own, and only then can your name be taken off. If they don’t qualify, you stay on the mortgage for another term. Before agreeing, talk openly about expectations: How long might you be on the mortgage? What’s the plan for eventually removing you? Having these conversations upfront prevents surprises later. It Affects Your Own Borrowing Power When lenders calculate your debt service ratios, the co-signed mortgage counts as your debt—even if you never make a payment on it. This could reduce how much you’re able to borrow in the future, whether it’s for your own home, an investment property, or even refinancing. If you see another mortgage in your future, you’ll want to consider how co-signing could limit your options. The Upside: Helping Someone Get Ahead On the positive side, co-signing can be life-changing for the borrower. You could be helping a family member or friend buy their first home, start building equity, or take an important step forward financially. If handled with clear expectations and trust, it can be a meaningful way to support someone you care about. The Bottom Line Co-signing a mortgage comes with both risks and rewards. It’s not a decision to take lightly, but with careful planning, transparency, and professional advice, it can be done responsibly. If you’re considering co-signing—or want to explore safer alternatives—let’s connect. I’d be happy to walk you through what to expect and help you decide if it’s the right move for you.